Be Kind, Remind

Five years ago, I almost lost my kids in a car accident. They were passengers in a car with my ex husband, on a nice and sunny, clear afternoon. My ex husband (who has a lengthy history of accidents due to drunk driving or just being fucked up on whatever he could find) went off the road, later blaming it on swerving to avoid hitting a dog (the other 7 witnesses said there was no dog, and he simply drifted off the road). What happened next, has left both of my kids with nightmares they can’t escape.
The car blasted through the guard rail, rolled down a steep hill into a ravine, where they hit a tree, and the car caught fire. Their seatbelts were stuck, so they had to work their way out of them (driver never wore one). Their doors were stuck as well, so they had to climb out of the window. No sooner did everyone get out, then the car exploded, sending my ex husband flying.
He got no charges on him, despite the fact that hypodermic needles were found in his car wreckage. No sobriety tests were administered, which would normally seem weird to me, but I read it in the police report so I guess they didn’t care about his OUI history (*eventually they did, after a few more offenses and several years). The tow company that pulled the car said that nobody should have survived a crash like that.
I got a call from him that night, and he told me it was “no big deal, just a little accident.”
I can’t imagine experiencing that, EVER, much less as a 9- or 11- year old kid. It’s so much a big deal. They’re lucky to be alive today, and I don’t know what I would do if they weren’t here. I don’t even think I would still be here.
Cherish your loved ones, let them know you appreciate them. Be there for them, even if it doesn’t bring you anything extra, it might make all the difference to them. You never know when you have said your last word to someone. Try not to make it a hateful one.

-jg